Bigfoot Sad

R.I.P.

Me unconscionable plagiarist

Me just find out that there is human who write fake book about Bigfoot, and he talk even prettier than me (me not know about this until yesterday). Me would accuse him of stealing Bigfoot's idea, but Yeti point out that human published his 1st book 2 years ago, which make Bigfoot look like he is the one who is stealing the idea from the human.

This make me sad, Bigfoot thought about not making any more posts because of this. Then me think that no, me will keep writing, and that the best way to handle the problem is to invite Graham Roumieu (if that is his real name) to Bigfoot's cave, rip out his liver, eat it in front of him and watch him bleed to death while Yeti giggle uncontrollably and play the harpsichord. Me enjoy all things baroque.

My foot can walk right through the door

Me and Yeti sneak into drive-in and see "King Kong" last night. Me liked the movie, except for 2 things:

1) Too many looks of love and longing between human and ape. This seemed unnatural and disturb Bigfoot.

2) His foot was huge! This make Bigfoot feel inadequate. What if Sasquatch see and decide my foot can no longer satisfy her needs?

Yeti tell me not to worry, that the ape was make-believe, and that I still have the biggest feet he has ever seen. This no make me feel better; Bigfoot, Yeti, Goatsucker, and Sasquatch are make believe, but we also exist at the same time, so doesn't that mean that Kong is also real? Yeti say that sounds like "Quantum Physics bullshit. And besides, I don't recall seeing Kong's king-sized genitalia, so relax."

Yeti no like "My Morning Jacket"

He say "I take back what I said before, they really do suck as hard as you would think by my previous description. What a waste of 12 bucks...that's the last time I buy a CD before previewing it on Limewire, that's for goddamn sure..."

Yeti like "My Morning Jacket"

He say that "they combine the worst aspects of U2 and Coldplay, but for some reason, you don't want to kill them."